good blog you got

it's a little creepy

2011-01-11T08:37:00.000-08:00

cwalker: he talks and acts like JR... It's a little creepy
cwalker: luckily I live in Iowa and only have to see him once a month ;)
___nobody: i've never seen "luckily" and "live in Iowa" together in the same sentence

i'm pretty sure

2010-12-29T22:48:00.000-08:00

___nobody: actually i'm pretty sure
___nobody: CPS will show up to your house
___nobody: if you waterboard your own child

a cog story

2010-11-12T14:12:00.001-08:00

"Who am I?" the little cog asked to no one in particular.

Housed inside the dark box, it was difficult to tell. A piece of metal spinning in place? The questions were many. The answers few. But by looking around, the cog was not impressed with it's situation: darkness and uncertainty were the order of the day.

"I do matter" the cog said to itself while it looked around. It saw other cogs, also spinning in place, meshed with each other, each spinning clockwise, counterclockwise, and clockwise again. The other cogs were silent as the cog mused to itself.

"I matter" the cog reiterated. "I want to spin my own way!" it said, to no one.

The other cogs did not notice the outburst. They continued to spin in their places, clockwise, counterclockwise, and clockwise again.

The cog paused for a second, then grew strong in it's resolve. It thought about how it would spin, how it wanted to spin, how fast it would spin, in it's perfect situation. "How would I get there?" asked the cog. The other cogs were silent.

It wrestled with itself, and spun faster and faster. It enjoyed it's new speed, reveling in how fast it was spinning. The cog was unimpressed with it though, spinning in place, still dark, still uncertain what it was meant for.

The cog wanted more than to be by itself. It struggled and struggled, moving closer to another cog. Closer and closer it got, until it could see the teeth of the other cog. The other cog said nothing as it got near.

Interaction with other cogs, thought the cog, must be the best.

Finally they touched, and began to spin together. Happy at last, the cog felt it had found it's place, spinning together with the rest.

The cog tried to speed up, but it quickly found that it could not go so fast, for the other cog he was spinning with would not go so fast. The cog tried harder, but then he saw all the other cogs his new companion was meshed with as well. A long line of cogs stretched off into the darkness.

A little cog can only do so much.

He struggled more, trying to change the direction he spun. No luck, as his new companion and all the other cogs were spinning in the single direction. Clockwise, counterclockwise, and clockwise again. The other cogs remained silent.

"But what about me?" said the cog, spinning at a fixed speed, in a fixed direction. "How should I spin?"

His companion noticed him at last. "We are all but cogs here, and you are no different friend."

The cog found this upsetting: "But I would like to spin faster!"

His companion replied: "The machine is the one that sets the speed, dear friend. And we all obey the machine."

The cog became silent, spinning clockwise, counterclockwise, and clockwise again.

typing in the right window

2010-11-08T20:18:00.000-08:00

___nobody: ya
___nobody: did I respond to you on that?
Matt: yes
___nobody: google talk has me all over the place. I don't know who I am typing too
___nobody: so many webcams open
___nobody: can't keep the girls straight
Matt: well at least you're typing in the right window
___nobody: other windows
___nobody: really don't require typing

i have these dreams

2010-11-03T23:49:00.000-07:00

Gaurav: go ahead
Gaurav: have a good sleep
Gaurav: and sweet dreams of games
___nobody: i have these dreams
___nobody: but i wake up at the end screaming
___nobody: is that the same?

that's enough to impress chicks

2010-10-18T12:18:00.000-07:00

___nobody: did the book help
Matt: yeah the book was good,
Matt: used it to get through the gallery quickly since I'm not a huge art fan
Matt: had lots of good stuff in it
___nobody: good
___nobody: just know that monet and manet draw fuzzy pastel shit on lakes
___nobody: that's enough to impress chicks

good for architects

2010-07-12T10:48:00.000-07:00

___nobody: some hope for me
___nobody: http://java.dzone.com/articles/diy-mobile-development-android
mterry: no programming experience to write apps - that's right up your alley
___nobody: good for architects
___nobody: just draw lines & boxes
___nobody: where is the
___nobody: "put this component in the cloud" option

usually 3-5 years later

2010-07-01T13:20:00.001-07:00

___nobody: http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20100701/ap_on_re_la_am_ca/tropical_weather
alex: many have died from my emanations
___nobody: usually 3 to 5 years later though
___nobody: those retrovirals are making it longer too

a piece of yahoo history (you)

2010-05-19T14:53:00.001-07:00

gblair: I'll treasure that png as an icon of my wonderful time at yahoo

don't do anything rash

2010-04-30T14:24:00.000-07:00

joel: there are tons of jobs for loser boys like you
___nobody: question is
___nobody: how to escape in good way
___nobody: it is like vietnam
___nobody: honorable retreat
___nobody: not fleeing like a bitch
___nobody: on the titanic
___nobody: the steerage passengers jumped off the side
___nobody: and froze in the water
___nobody: premier class got the elegant lifeboat
___nobody: for a little early morning boating
___nobody: note to self: be the premier class

cmr is in draft state

2010-04-28T10:08:00.000-07:00

vdan: Carols mail snippet:
vdan: "In the meantime,
vdan: remember that these goals
vdan: are everyone’s responsibility.
vdan: We all need to work together
vdan: to achieve them this year."
___nobody: lol
___nobody: I am going to reject Carol's CMR
___nobody: reason for rejection
___nobody: CMR is in draft state
___nobody: within 12 months of release date

special olympics high jump

2010-02-12T13:27:00.000-08:00

asink: yeah, things will be a bit goofy
asink: we'll end up using duct tape and glue to get the smoke tests working
___nobody: lets keep the bar very low
___nobody: so that when we barely manage to jump above it
___nobody: we will be happy
___nobody: this is the special olympics high jump
___nobody: and you, you are retarded little bobby

bears only

2009-10-13T15:36:00.000-07:00

___nobody: i can never impress u
jdowns: you always impress me, at least with volume of body hair
___nobody: you'd really think the park service
___nobody: would be after me with a tranquilizer gun by now, huh
jdowns: ever had a baby bear follow you home?
___nobody: no but i went into this bar that said "bears only"
___nobody: boy what a surprise

what is there to do in arizona

2009-09-18T11:30:00.000-07:00

Irvin: shark what is there to do in arizona?
___nobody: suffer

latino chicks

2009-09-10T13:48:00.001-07:00

Albert: come and experience our latest customer: http://www.quepasa.com/
Albert: and look at latino chicks all day as your at it
___nobody: only twofish would look at latino chicks
___nobody: and not latina.

i can't reach my phone

2009-09-01T15:47:00.001-07:00

hfactora: u there pls?
hfactora: pls call me asap
hfactora: at my desk
___nobody: i can't reach my phone
hfactora: now :(
___nobody: can barly rech kyboard

bad news

2009-08-27T17:30:00.000-07:00

___nobody: so
___nobody: good news
___nobody: all the tasks are planned out
bji: great
___nobody: bad news
___nobody: your name is on all of them

not worrying about making things beautiful

2009-08-06T15:57:00.000-07:00

Matt: I'm creating /config with hostsconf in it, moving it out of legacy
___nobody: ok, that sounds cool
___nobody: I am trying to avoid worrying about
___nobody: the most beautiful place in the world for things
___nobody: instead just move them to some place
___nobody: that's at least an improvement
___nobody: can always move them to better place later
Matt: not worrying about making things beautiful, why am I not surprised
___nobody: this is the same process
___nobody: i go thru in the morning before work

YOU HAVE NO DEFENSE

2009-07-29T15:13:00.000-07:00

___nobody: http://www.wired.com/epicenter/2009/07/yahoo-gives-up/
Venkat: Liked this sentence from the article
Venkat: "talented — but stifled — engineers, has decided to become just a middleman between a gullible and undemanding audience and eager advertisers."
___nobody: yeah
___nobody: it's not a pretty article.
Venkat: yeah. anyway that's how things will be.
Venkat: i dont want to look at those articles for today.
___nobody: neither do i
___nobody: you don't even drink
___nobody: YOU HAVE NO DEFENSE

why am i laughing

2009-07-29T14:32:00.000-07:00

Albert: why is yahoo's P/E 5046?
___nobody: because
___nobody: EPS is like .000003
Albert: oh
Albert: because you guys broke even almost
Albert: the previous quarter?
___nobody: yeah
___nobody: terrible.
Albert: yeah I saw the number and thought it was a bug at first
___nobody: ha ha ha
___nobody: i mean
___nobody: why am i laughing?

i don't want your help

2009-07-05T21:00:00.001-07:00

leo: You're from canada
leo: I don't want your help

someone else is way better than you

2009-07-02T15:06:00.000-07:00

Eron: youtube is a constant reminder
Eron: that no matter how hard you try
Eron: someone else is way better than you
Eron: with much less effort.

end up being hot

2009-07-02T14:29:00.000-07:00

___nobody: i don't want to spend that much time with them
___nobody: I think I would strangle somebody
___nobody: maybe that would end up being hot
___nobody: like david carradine

michael jackson does not honor ttl

2009-06-25T19:09:00.001-07:00

___nobody: there's still a lot of traffic
martin: change was 35 min ago
martin: with a ttl of 30 min
___nobody: so it's not 100% back yet
martin: but we're seeing a lot of traffic still
martin: granted not everyone honors ttl
___nobody: michael jackson does not honor ttl

hope for sadness

2009-06-24T10:47:00.001-07:00

luke: we asked her 10 times to give details on the metrics
luke: so we didn't go through all the crazy setup for nothing
luke: and I'm afraid that's exactly what's happening.
___nobody: so we get a week of data
___nobody: she gets to chew on it
___nobody: she is happy, or, she is sad
___nobody: i care not
___nobody: other than it vindicates me if she's sad
___nobody: so maybe i do care
___nobody: i hope for sadness

babies are ugly

2009-05-04T10:10:00.000-07:00

Matt: babies are ugly
Matt: now - some babies are uglier than others
Matt: but yes, all fairly ugly
___nobody: babies on containers of toilet paper
___nobody: that's as cute as you'll get
___nobody: the ugly ones, though
___nobody: no amount of screaming at it or shaking it
___nobody: will make it cute

seems related somehow

2009-04-07T16:58:00.000-07:00

Brandon: I need a vacation
Brandon: I haven't been to Maui since I was 16
Brandon: time for the tropics
___nobody: that sounds relaxing
Brandon: so now it's time to try and get in beach shape by August
___nobody: crack
Brandon: amputation
___nobody: midget sex
___nobody: wait
___nobody: i guess that doesn't go with it
___nobody: but seems related somehow

hard to believe

2009-03-27T14:35:00.000-07:00

brinclhof2002: what does it mean if argv[1] and argv[2]
brinclhof2002: are both null
ben: what's argc?
brinclhof2002: must be 3
ben: hard to believe.
brinclhof2002: if it wasn't 3
brinclhof2002: I wouldn't get past the first line of this
ben: It is unlikely
ben: that you've discovered a bug in argument parsing
ben: that has gone unnoticed for the last 35 years.

what u do now

2009-03-05T16:11:00.000-08:00

Albert: let me know when you guys need a build engineer
Albert: I need an easy job
Albert: I want to mindlessly push buttons for money
___nobody: isn't that what u do now

get into porn

2009-02-25T10:23:00.000-08:00

___nobody: i want lots of money
___nobody: what to do
Adam: well
Adam: get into porn
___nobody: into making or consuming
___nobody: cuz i've got one of those down

not lost upon me

2009-02-10T16:59:00.000-08:00

___nobody: yhoo gets such a high level of quality from me
Denis: should it be: yahoo "gets" such a "high level"
Denis: of "quality" from "me"
___nobody: your unemployed sarcasm
___nobody: is not lost upon me

not quite what i'm hoping for

2008-12-03T15:59:00.000-08:00

matt: wanna see a good movie? "The Orphanage"
matt: awesome
___nobody: this could be hot
___nobody: but somehow
___nobody: i suspect it's not quite what i'm hoping for

to think i missed it

2008-12-01T10:37:00.000-08:00

joel: were angry
___nobody: angry?
joel: was going to make some illegal alien
joel: joke
joel: but my computer is freezing
___nobody: damn
___nobody: and to think I missed it
joel: indeed

i am taking off

2008-11-26T14:29:00.000-08:00

bji: I am taking off. Happy Thanksgiving!
___nobody: what the f does "taking off" mean
___nobody: when you are working from home
___nobody: "i'm going to another room"
___nobody: "i'm ignoring you"?

i always made fun of her

2008-11-10T10:32:00.000-08:00

Case: I knew a girl in high school once who was always trying to kill herself
Case: I always made fun of her

lifestyle choice

2008-10-31T13:50:00.001-07:00

issc: it's a personal lifestyle choice.
issc: like being a vegetarian, or having sex with dead people.

the sistine chapel of our age

2008-10-01T11:09:00.000-07:00

JD: i love lesbians
Case: Who doesn't, these days?
JD: true dat
JD: it's beautiful
Case: That is true, it's the Sistine Chapel of our age

no ladyboys

2008-09-23T01:02:00.000-07:00

___nobody: have u been arrested yet
Matt: haha I just got to Hong Kong
Matt: it's too early
___nobody: the phrase for "no ladyboys" is hwang ko ni ma

everything looks nice on brochures

2008-09-18T11:39:00.000-07:00

Albert: going to visit the new office
___nobody: is it sweet
Albert: I dunno yet...we'll have to see if it is nice
___nobody: you have not seen?
Albert:only in pictures
Albert: but everything looks nice on brochures
Albert: thats how I ended up joining yahoo
___nobody: lol
___nobody: look where it got you
Albert: and twofish
___nobody: lol
___nobody: look where it got you

but slower

2008-09-08T12:14:00.000-07:00

ravihacks: ok
ravihacks: see he already responded
___nobody: damn
___nobody: he's not on yhoo time
ravihacks: what's yahoo time
___nobody: it's like "hawaii time", but slower

obviously existing technology is not good enough

2008-09-02T15:20:00.000-07:00

___nobody: now you're doing a browser, nutso
Nick: no kidding. The browser wars are starting again...
___nobody: i think next goog should come out with it's own condom
___nobody: because obviously existing technology is not good enough
Nick: How you know about the secret project?!?!?!
Nick: Who told you?
___nobody: i've been volunteering
___nobody: stress testing, baby

here is a secret

2008-08-11T17:03:00.000-07:00

Alex: yeah, the reason I chortled a bit was that when they said "use a connection pool"
Alex: they pointed at http://vault.XXXXXXXXXXXXX/XXXXX.java?rev=HEAD
Alex: which effectively does the same thing that I do
___nobody: here is a secret:
___nobody: nobody at yahoo should be coding

nevermind

2008-07-28T01:29:00.000-07:00

___nobody: i think i left it in the car
___nobody: probably
___nobody: fuck i hope it's in the car
Denis: so you got a car. i like that in a man
___nobody: it wasn't even my car
___nobody: i am a loser
Denis: a loser, i like that in a
Denis: wait
Denis: nm

sumthin xtraordinary

2008-07-23T11:59:00.000-07:00

Pranavanshu: ohkay.....u now
Pranavanshu: how to take admissions
Pranavanshu: in MBA Univs In us
Pranavanshu: like...stanfrd and howrd
___nobody: it starts with an application
___nobody: and a paper on why you should get in
Pranavanshu: haha...i noe dat..
Pranavanshu: but any oder
Pranavanshu: req
Pranavanshu: sumthin xtraordinary??
___nobody: you may have a problem with the paper

the same excuse

2008-07-17T11:23:00.001-07:00

Albert: I drive in with muscle memory
Albert: no clue what the name of the exit I take is
Albert: just exit right after the airplane museum
___nobody: is this the same excuse you use for
___nobody: why you beat those homeless people

working the referral bonus

2008-07-17T11:08:00.000-07:00

___nobody: did you feed xxxxx xxxxxx's name to the google HR sharks
Nick: yep yep. They locked me in a room and beat me silly until I named names.
___nobody: i said u were just working the referral bonus
Nick: oh, no. Actually, I enjoyed the beatings.

grats

2008-07-14T13:44:00.001-07:00

Joel: i bought a piece of artwork
Joel: was not too expensive
Joel: its my entire wall
Joel: its really cool
___nobody: wow
___nobody: you are gay
___nobody: grats

just to be polite

2008-06-30T15:21:00.000-07:00

Albert: are u going to wimp out on our picnic this year
___nobody: when is the picnic
___nobody: am i invited
Albert: damn u never signed up for the yahoo group?
Albert: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/...
___nobody: ok done
Albert: woo hoo
Albert: u used ur yahoo-inc address
___nobody: is that bad
Albert: planning on keeping that for a while?
___nobody: if i need it for next year
___nobody: i'll just rely on you reminding me in person
___nobody: just like this year
___nobody: except i go thru the motions of joining your group
___nobody: just to be polite

which ad is better

2008-06-19T17:28:00.000-07:00

too much porn on the old one

2008-06-09T14:40:00.000-07:00

___nobody: i need a new computer
Sandy: why do you need a new one?
Sandy: too much porn on the old one?
___nobody: well after those federal agents seized the last one
___nobody: shrug
___nobody: what can yah do
Sandy: they didn't give it back?
Sandy: maybe it's because you had all those naughty pictures
Sandy: with the HK movie stars on it
___nobody: my pride & joy
___nobody: well mostly the latter

does in fact go to 11

2008-05-19T22:53:00.000-07:00

William: I went out to lunch to meet a few old co-workers
William: my boss told me
William: "you're going to lunch with people that could instigate serious harm for this company"
William: and that I shouldn't talk about anything I'm doing at work.
William: So apparently his crazy dial does in fact go to 11,
William: for when he needs that extra little bit of crazy

not insanely rich

2008-05-06T11:38:00.000-07:00

___nobody: it is good for the world that i am not insanely rich
___nobody: otherwise i would buy death lasers
___nobody: killer satellites,
___nobody: underground lairs in
___nobody: enigmatic southeast asian countries
___nobody: patrolled by nubile,
___nobody: female dwarf assassins

try to avoid #1

2008-04-04T16:42:00.001-07:00

Dean: Do you ever write anything interesting in your blog,
Dean: or do you just cut and paste in IM conversations?
___nobody: i try to avoid #1

what a mess

2008-04-03T19:12:00.000-07:00

Dean: What have you done this week. :p
___nobody: I cleaned up the installation of some servers
___nobody: What a mess that is
___nobody: it's like the kitty litter box
___nobody: in the house of a thousand cats
___nobody: each cat making some half assed attempt
___nobody: at pushing litter over their "contributions"
___nobody: but its really just
___nobody: not trying to step in anybody else's

you are a king

2008-03-25T01:00:00.000-07:00

denis: you are a king among
denis: bigger and better kings

my tundra

2008-03-10T14:11:00.001-07:00

nolan: I have some good news from Alaska
___nobody: from alaska?
___nobody: NOLAN 1, POLAR BEARS 0
nolan: Exactly
___nobody: BEEYOTCH THIS IS MY TUNDRA!
___nobody: MY TUNDRA!

like angels typing

2008-02-24T16:51:00.000-08:00

denis: vista yahoo! messenger makes your words so beautiful
___nobody: like angels typing
___nobody: then, posing nude in front of webcam

the key is the hot tub

2008-02-15T15:46:00.000-08:00

Brandon: I want to go home and play pirates now
___nobody: do it
___nobody: I did a bad thing and got "Sims 2"
___nobody: trying to get this all girl household
___nobody: to all be sleeping with each other
Brandon: nice
___nobody: the key is the hot tub
Brandon: does it allow that?
___nobody: yeah
___nobody: they are sluts

before only 95%

2008-02-08T00:50:00.001-08:00

___nobody: yes, you know i must always be right
Tanja: you??? since when???
___nobody: 2001, maybe 2002
___nobody: since then...100%
___nobody: before, only 95, 96%

send me my pimp check

2008-02-06T17:26:00.000-08:00

Matt: does MS own your ass yet?
___nobody: not yet
Matt: awesome.. your stock got a good pump
___nobody: it did
___nobody: I dumped last night
Matt: nice!
Matt: send me my pimp check
___nobody: all $5.35 is YOURS
Matt: hahaha
Matt: i gotta run to another meeting... bbiab
Matt: don't get fired in the next hour
___nobody: i'll drop a note to jerry

great negotiation

2008-01-17T21:56:00.000-08:00

Joel: i want something
Joel: quick and easy
Joel: just a search/inquiry/find form tied to google
Joel: mash up
___nobody: well,
___nobody: How much are
___nobody: east europeans
Joel: $20 - 30 a hour
___nobody: seems a lot
Joel: $15 a hour
___nobody: ok ok
Joel: nice
Joel: great negotiation
___nobody: $5 /hr and throw in your sister

that's so cute

2008-01-16T11:16:00.000-08:00

Mun-Wai: hey, any visitors today other than Zane?
Mun-Wai: am looking for Bob
___nobody: I have not seen him
___nobody: how did you know zane was here?
Mun-Wai: you should know by now I know everything
___nobody: lol
___nobody: that's a "lol" in a "ha ha, that's so cute" kind of way

your dear, sweet, precious life

2008-01-15T11:55:00.000-08:00

___nobody: are u commuting to SF
___nobody: every day
Irvin: yeahhh
Irvin: i hate this mothefucking commute
Irvin: am gonna move soon
___nobody: yeah no shit
___nobody: your life
___nobody: your dear, sweet, precious life
___nobody: well
___nobody: ok your life
___nobody: is being spent on that commute
Irvin: yes.
___nobody: what else yah gonna spend it on
___nobody: really

enough with the upside

2008-01-14T01:01:00.000-08:00

Adam: being a VP is quite uneventful
Adam: sudden burst of terror
Adam: combined with long lulls
Adam: reminds me of trench war
___nobody: does this bring fame fortune
___nobody: big ca$$$h cheques
Adam: it brings a company car, ulcers and receeding hair
___nobody: but enough with the upside
___nobody: what's wrong with it?

more attractive and compelling

2008-01-10T21:46:00.001-08:00

Albert: how come scott moore's pic is not on here?
Albert: http://yhoo.client.shareholder.com/press/management.cfm
___nobody: gah I don't want to even look at that
___nobody: they look so god damn ugly compared to
___nobody: say
___nobody: http://www.google.com/intl/en/corporate/execs.html
Albert: wow Cerf is there
___nobody: see even google's management staff
___nobody: are more attractive and compelling
Albert: hahaah
___nobody: oops i just scrolled down
___nobody: scratch that

golf is fucking retarded

2007-12-20T12:53:00.000-08:00

jeff: I think you should take up golf.
jeff: I'd bet you could smack the ball a long ways, and give ol' Clint a run for his money when you're in town. Walking the course like we do gives you some nice exercise, too.
___nobody: hey that sounds great
___nobody: except for one thing
___nobody: golf is fucking retarded

your meat is softer

2007-11-27T15:52:00.000-08:00

Albert: I've had steak from both your bbq and Lee's bbq.
Albert: Your meat is softer.

what the bathtub is for

2007-11-12T11:20:00.000-08:00

Brandon: I did my quarterly house deep-scrub
Brandon: I need a fucking maid, I hate that shit
___nobody: I think it does make you messier though
Brandon: you mean having a maid?
___nobody: yeahs
___nobody: cuz you know it's gonna get cleaned
Brandon: what are you doing, taking a crap in the sink? geez
___nobody: just saying, you never know when you're going to need relief
Brandon: that's what the bathtub is for, rookie

only your second message

2007-11-04T22:57:00.000-08:00

Denis: I hope you did something very useful today
___nobody: today was kind of a social day
___nobody: my friend harley was here from tucson
Denis: it is only your second message and you are already lying
___nobody: just think, with this kinda growth curve
___nobody: how good it'll be by message #5

still a spark

2007-10-30T16:59:00.000-07:00

William: Haven't written seriously, well, ever maybe, but
William: I used to do it a lot more.
William: Thought the expo would be a fun way to see if there was still a spark
___nobody: you should move straight on to dirty romance fiction
William: fuck you

increased sensitivity

2007-10-26T17:25:00.001-07:00

___nobody: i will not post your last comment
___nobody: out of my increased sensitivity

fail

2007-10-22T15:11:00.001-07:00

a trick question

2007-10-15T15:44:00.000-07:00

Irvin: do you wear underwear 100% of the time?
___nobody: is this a trick question?

all out of win

2007-08-30T21:12:00.000-07:00

Denis: you gonna get rich soon or what?
Denis: i am tired of poor ___nobody
___nobody: honestly you'd quickly tire of rich nobody,
___nobody: or even
___nobody: well-to-do nobody
Denis: i cant win...can I
___nobody: i'm sorry sir.
___nobody: we're all out of Win.
___nobody: however, we're having a special on Lose.

i will model for u

2007-08-20T18:09:00.001-07:00

Ben: I am dating a former lingerie/erotic model
Ben: she is a former chef
Ben: coming over wednesday to teach me more cooking
Ben: cooking dates rock
___nobody: model and chef??wtf
Ben: I will ask you out on a cooking date
___nobody: i will model for u
Ben: a/s/l
___nobody: webcam?

who is this

2007-08-17T12:13:00.001-07:00

Denis: they are so cute http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_oLdX5wmLis
___nobody: i half expect something horrific to happen
___nobody: at the end of this
Denis: they get served with burgundy sauce
Denis: and risoto
___nobody: ok it's pretty cute
___nobody: when did your account get hacked
___nobody: who is this
___nobody: WHO IS THIS

i forgot to tell you

2007-08-13T17:34:00.000-07:00

___nobody: i thought i had something to tell you
___nobody: but i forgot
___nobody: oh, I did not see that movie, sunlight
___nobody: or starlight
___nobody: or whatever.
Eron: sunshine
Eron: you like?
Eron: oh you didn't see it.
Eron: wow, why would you even mention that?
Eron: oh!!!
Eron: I forgot to tell you.
Eron: I didn't visit China last weekend.
Eron: sweet, we have all sorts of conversation pieces lined up now.

always the thinker

2007-08-13T17:28:00.000-07:00

___nobody: looking at TVs
Brandon: what kind of TVs?
___nobody: i saw this 46" LCD
___nobody: it looks pretty
Brandon: I can't get a bigger TV
___nobody: now that is a very real problem
___nobody: my downstairs, not so big
Brandon: just measure the dimensions of the tv
Brandon: get a piece of cardboard
Brandon: see how it'll look
___nobody: you were always the thinker

on your own for this one

2007-08-09T01:00:00.000-07:00

Ravi: heh, it all seems to be down
___nobody: on production?
Ravi: yes prod is down
___nobody: there's no errors in log
Ravi: weird
___nobody: there
___nobody: i got a page back
Ravi: yes. I can't type
Ravi: introduced a typo in an important file
___nobody: well
___nobody: i have never, ever done that
Ravi: I figured
___nobody: so you are on your own for this one

music to my ears

2007-08-08T23:06:00.000-07:00

Sandy: why do you keep logging in and out
Sandy: The uncertainty is killing me!
___nobody: it's my deep seated
___nobody: fear of committment
___nobody: no really it's just the piece of crap y! web messenger
Sandy: sure, blame it on web messenger when you know it's something else
___nobody: it's really the attention I get from the ladies
___nobody: "Hey, stop that"
Sandy: "Stop that" "I'm going to call security"
Sandy: "Hey, this is the ladies' bathroom"
___nobody: it's like music to my ears

whee

2007-07-30T11:35:00.001-07:00

___nobody: i think the finance charts should
___nobody: always add the sleigh ride for falling stocks
Albert: hahah

success at last

2007-07-20T11:22:00.000-07:00

more like infamous

2007-07-17T12:57:00.000-07:00

Matt: checked logs this morning, everything is running fine
___nobody: sweet.
___nobody: i take back everything i said
Matt: oh man what have you been telling Denis
___nobody: pshh not just denis
___nobody: more like all-sunnyvale@
Matt: so that means people will know who I am now, sweet
___nobody: you're famous
___nobody: in some way
___nobody: well i guess that'd be more like infamous
___nobody: whoops

extreme not caring

2007-07-17T12:38:00.001-07:00

Irvin: thanks for giving me 24 hours notice
Irvin: you were listening!
___nobody: see
___nobody: i do care
___nobody: on the inside
___nobody: underneath this exterior of
___nobody: extreme not caring

code word for hookers

2007-07-15T22:09:00.000-07:00

Irvin: whats this i hear about unrequited hotpot
___nobody: yes we need hotpot
Irvin: yes we do
Irvin: found a top dog in san jose
Irvin: it's good
___nobody: top dog?
___nobody: is this some code word for hookers

Stanley: monkey do you know of the 2 for 1 deal in hot pot place
___nobody: no
___nobody: is this some code word for hookers

strong profanity filter

2007-07-05T11:47:00.000-07:00

___nobody: i'm talking with "pamela" right now
Mun-Wai: oh
Mun-Wai: I was talking to someone
Mun-Wai: don't know the name
___nobody: "pamela" is 28
Mun-Wai: oh my!
Mun-Wai: you chatted up a storm!
Mun-Wai: you're going to know "pamela"'s whole life history
___nobody: it's amazing what you can do with only 2 lines
___nobody: of chat text and a
___nobody: strong profanity filter

a pretty good excuse

2007-07-02T01:13:00.000-07:00

Denis: can my email be white listed for game-dev list?
___nobody: i dunno, probably
___nobody: the smart IT guy will ask WTF, why don't you
___nobody: just connect to corp email from home
___nobody: to which you better come up
___nobody: with a pretty good excuse
___nobody: like
___nobody: "i have cancer"

must have been rough

2007-06-25T12:22:00.000-07:00

Sandy: whoo hoo, back at work (finally)
Sandy: I hate being away from this place
___nobody: it must have been rough
___nobody: away from email, meetings
Sandy: It was terrible, but I just kept thinking
Sandy: "don't worry, the meetings will be back"
___nobody: you're such a survivor

for my next trick

2007-06-22T22:13:00.000-07:00

Albert: people are leaving google in droves too as options are vesting
___nobody: Wonder what the fuck they do
Albert: like all those rich people who left from yahoo
Albert: they'll be bored
___nobody: They are all fuckups
___nobody: 90% of people leaving YHOO rich == fuckups
Albert: damn...so I should be happy to be poor and
Albert: under command and control management?
___nobody: well no no
___nobody: but you have structure, motivation, err..
___nobody: lol, dumbass argues against being rich
___nobody: for my next trick
___nobody: i shall argue why ugly chicks are better than hot ones

well after quitting time

2007-06-21T12:41:00.000-07:00

Irvin: shark
Irvin: 7pm tonight right?
___nobody: yes
Irvin: cool
Irvin: 7pm. hmm
Irvin: thats well after quitting time
Irvin: i may have to ride my bike home
Irvin: and then drive back out
___nobody: i trust you to call upon your years of experience
___nobody: in handling crisis like these
___nobody: to figure out the best plan of action

the job i dreamed of

2007-06-12T16:41:00.000-07:00

___nobody: http://sims.yahoo.com/community/profile/bW_8ucQY1Mkh1VGoY0WVi.9p~A
gsheridan: nice beard
___nobody: you are helping these people
___nobody: really, more of "aiding and abetting"
gsheridan: I think you mean to say: I am "helping" these people.
gsheridan: this is the job I dreamed of doing as a child
gsheridan: I'm so proud to go home everyday
gsheridan: and share my work stories with my children.
___nobody: it kinda makes all those
___nobody: "stay in school and do well" talks kinda ring hollow, eh

this chat sucked

2007-06-11T18:43:00.000-07:00

Irvin: its like this place is fighting a master ninja
Irvin: its already dead
Irvin: just doesnt know it yet
Irvin: isnt that awesome?
Irvin: its like front row to a snuff film
Irvin: do i make it to your blog again?
___nobody: no
Irvin: oh
___nobody: this chat sucked

i blame zombies

2007-06-04T13:29:00.000-07:00

___nobody: it could be a bug, could be something else, I dunno
___nobody: its just a bad thing when you restart stuff and it starts working again
Kira: yah
Kira: i blame zombies.
Kira: they're always responsible, those zombies.

right up your alley

2007-05-25T12:07:00.000-07:00

___nobody: my dentist is a fucking witch
___nobody: i think
Irvin: why
Irvin: what did she do to you
___nobody: fucking
___nobody: ripped my mouth apart
Irvin: haha
Irvin: i havent seen a dentist in afew years
___nobody: really
Irvin: yeah
Irvin: should go
___nobody: I have one for u
___nobody: she's cute but cruel
Irvin: oh?
Irvin: sign me up
Irvin: im masochistic
___nobody: dude she is right up your alley
___nobody: she can dish out as much hurt as you want
___nobody: for a $50 copay

close enough

2007-05-21T18:18:00.001-07:00

William: do you only post your chats?
___nobody: umm i have thought about making it for others to submit
___nobody: but mostly just posting my own
___nobody: as i am the funniest fucking person in the world
William: No, just the most obnoxious.
___nobody: close enough
William: Heh - is that going in the blog?
___nobody: see how easy it is

somehow that hurts

2007-05-16T15:40:00.000-07:00

Irvin: in my youtube account
Irvin: under the box labeled "Friends"
Irvin: in big 36 point font:
Irvin: "You have no Friends."
Irvin: somehow that hurts

no touching of the buttocks

2007-05-08T14:15:00.000-07:00

Irvin: shark i bought a football
___nobody: is this a refound youth
Irvin: perhaps
Irvin: or perhpas another failed attempt at creating a bonding experience
___nobody: throw the ball
___nobody: drink a beer
___nobody: check out some chicks
Irvin: how can it get better than that?
Irvin: man im already looking forward to this future as yet unplanned bonding expereince
___nobody: it's like a beer commercial
Irvin: yeah.... a bunch of guys tackling each other...
Irvin: but then helping each other up with that palm to palm thumb up grip
___nobody: yeah
___nobody: with a beer in the other hand
___nobody: to give to them
___nobody: and a slap on the back
___nobody: no touching of the buttocks
Irvin: thats where the commercials lose me
Irvin: its like... why no butt touching?
Irvin: butt toucher
___nobody: that's where you lose interest
___nobody: if only they kept going, following the interaction to it's logical and exciting conclusion

more into it

2007-05-03T22:24:00.000-07:00

___nobody: i've watched only 3 battlestar galacticas in the last season and a half
___nobody: maybe if they showed more boobs
___nobody: i'd be more into it

wrong move there

2007-05-01T11:24:00.000-07:00

___nobody: how is annika
Matt: annika?
Matt: you didn't hear?
Matt: we gave her up
Matt: way too much trouble
Matt: had no idea
___nobody: public auction?
Matt: well, somewhat public
Matt: down south in mexico
Matt: got some bank
Matt: blond babies go for cash down there
Matt: jennifer was PISSED
Matt: I didn't tell her about it until afterwards
Matt: wow
Matt: wrong move there

a quick 20 seconds

2007-04-24T23:01:00.000-07:00

___nobody: monkey just sitting here watching halo 3 TV ad
___nobody: awesome.
Stanley: money is it more awesome than the 300 TV ad
___nobody: monkey hard to say
___nobody: 300 TV ad also impressive.
___nobody: I think monkey I enjoy the trailers more than the actual thing now
Stanley: monkey understandable
Stanley: easy to digest
Stanley: a quick 20 seconds release
___nobody: monkey it's a minute of pounding action and then it's over
___nobody: rather than a couple moments of good stuff then a whole lot of boring talk